Life On The Planet

It's Almost!

It's almost the night before Christmas. A Cajun Night Before Christmas, that is.

Y'all pass a good one, you hear?

More Holly & Ivy

I've been singing The Holly and The Ivy nonstop for the past two weeks. This musical experience is not enhanced by the fact that I don't know all of the lyrics. Sometimes I combine Aussie Kim's version and the traditional version. Sometimes I just make up my own lyrics.

"The math book and THE PEN-cil

Are there to help YOU LEARN.

IF you pick them up AND use them.

The school day-AY will adjourn."

I think it's fun and festive.

The kids are ready to vomit.

So guess what the choir sang during the offertory on Sunday!!!! You got it - THE HOLLY AND THE IVY!!! Butterfly's eye role was a thing of beauty. Even Tiger cringed.

Anyhoo, here is a version that is highly preferable to mine.

Twerpy British Anglicans...they think they can sing. I could show them a thing or two.

Just ask my kids. Er, maybe you should just take my word for it.

 

A Different Christmas Spirit...

At A Hen's Pace.

I wonder how that would fly at my house.

The Holly & The Ivy

Advent is upon us. It is a time of reflection and anticipation. It is a time of peace and hope. It is a time to yell at your Australian friend for tainting your Advent wreath decorating experience because you couldn't stop singing this version of The Holly &The Ivy.
AUSSIE KIM!!!!!

Save the round-up. We're keeping the weeds.

(Just kidding, Kim.)

Thanksgiving Week: The Highlight Show

It's not much of a show, actually. I just liked the title. However, I can give you the highlights.

Last weekend: Boy Scout / Webelos joint camp-out. It got done to 23 degrees. Tiger got his polar bear patch. Woo-Hoo. Sal's troop held a flag retirement ceremony / campfire. They invited a troop from inner city Memphis to join them. It was fabulous. Freezing, but fabulous.

Monday: School work. "AAAHHGGG!" screamed the children as they ran in horror from the house. It had been a while since they had had to endure been treated to a full school day. (She chortles evilly as she types.) Sal came back from Scouts with a rough-housing induced black eye. Scratch Take-Christmas-Photos from week's to-do list. Boys.

Tuesday: More school work. Trying to get caught up in Greek. Will we ever get caught up in Greek?!? Speak to me, Oh Great and Omnipotent Mystical Eight Ball.

Wednesday: Whoever said peace on earth was a possibility obviously never shopped at my neighborhood Wal-Mart the night before Thanksgiving.

Peace. Ha! My Wal-Mart scoffs at your peace.

Thursday: Thanksgiving dinner with Aussie Kim, et al. Eat food. Drink tea. Swing on hammock. Eat food. Drink tea. Play board games. Eat food. Drink tea. Create massive bonfire in order to roast marshmallows. Eat marshmallows. Drink tea. Waddle home.

Friday: Shop. What else?

I hope your week has been as delightful as mine.

Tomorrow we put up the tree. And so it begins.

'Tis the Season...almost!

I haven't been feeling very festive this year. Usually by this point, the cards are addressed and stamped, the gifts are hidden and I'm backing cookies. This year...well, bah humbug. I'm tired. I'm sick. I'm sick and tired. Whine, whine, whine.

But today, ah today! I turned on the Christmas music and something magical happened.  I listened to Eartha Kitt sing Santa Baby! and suddenly I felt festive. Since then I have organized the Christmas lists, started the Christmas letter and spent quality time on American Girl dot com.

In the spirit of sharing the spirit, here are a few links to make you feel both warm and wintry.

No snow? Scribbit has plenty for all of us! Watch her power through a mile long sledding course. My kids are green - positively GREEN - with envy!

Once you're in from the cold you're sure to need some Candy Cane Cocoa! This sounds really good. (Not for the lactose intolerant!)

Looking for that unique gift item? Here's how to make a light-saber cozy...no joke. Somehow, to my way of thinking, light-saber and cozy just aren't words that should appear together in a sentence, but who am I to judge? It'll be slicing through the competition this holiday season.

Hope you enjoy the links. I don't know about the rest of you, but I've been an awfully good girl this year. So, Santa Baby, if you're reading this, the list is on the dresser. It's not too long.

Blog Breaks, Louisiana, Halloween & Driver's Ed

I've been enjoying a pleasant, though unplanned, break from blogging. After Sal and my folks got back to Memphis from Korea they had a day of rest. Then we all piled into Mom and Dad's minivan and headed south to Louisiana. Home, sweet home. Does the sight of Live Oaks give you the warm fuzzies? It should.

The kids had asked to spend Halloween with my folks. They live on a dead end road, and Halloween in their neighbor hood is pretty much a giant block party. (Very kid friendly with none of the scary stuff.) Obi-Wan and Lady Liberty raked in the loot. Sal decided he is too old to trick-or-treat, but he is definitely not too old to swipe his siblings' candy. The Hayleys (of momandkidsathome fame) came over, as well as some of The C.F.O.'s relatives. They're the ones who visisted us during Gustav, so it was nice to see them during a non-hurricane related event.

Earlier in the week, we went to visit my aunt and the farm. Dana, over at Principled Discovery, had a post recently about homeschoolers and driver's ed. Sal will probably be taking driver's ed. in the spring, however this week he had an old fashioned driver's ed. course at the farm. He drove the minivan around the barnyard. I figure he's the third generation to learn to drive there. Hey, it worked for the rest of us! The good news for my parent's minivan - no more cattle in the barnyard means cleaner tires. Eww.

One last thing, yesterday was my grandmother's birthday. Now, I'm not going to tell you how old she is because, well, I value my life. HOWEVER, I will say the her next birthday is going to be a big one!!! Happpy Birthday, Grandma!

I have to get ready to hit the road. Aussie Kim is picking us up on her way back from Houston. Think Thelma and Louise with five kids. And furniture from IKEA. Woo-Hoo. Boy, do we ever know how to travel!

 

 

 

Presidents, Chickens and Patriots

***This was originally posted on 09-11-07. Recently, Susan, of Corn and Oil, got chickens. This time around it's for her, as well as my sister - the chick who is definitely my favorite Patriot. 

Lend me your ears! As today is September 11, I need to send a HAPPY PATRIOT DAY to our Aunt the Major, who is serving our country overseas.  She arrived in Korea last Friday and has done tours in Iraq and in a country neighboring  Afghanistan.  She's my hero.

On this special occasion, I would like to take the opportunity to tell you what President Theodore Roosevelt had to say about the U.S.                                                                                       

"The things that will destroy America are prosperity-at-any-price, peace-at-any-price, safety first instead of duty, the love of soft living, and the get-rich-quick theory of life."

We found that quote in our KidsDiscover magazine that Nanny Moe sends to Sal.  The magazine and Nanny Moe are both favorites.

The CFO and I were discussing SOFT LIVING just the other day.  He was reading his beloved Country Living, the book that tells you how to live without things that flush in the night AND how survive on three kernels of corn and a slice of beef jerky (that you made) for a month.  (No sarcasm here.)  Anyway, it brought to mind for Sal one of the CFO's less than successful let's-get-back-to-nature schemes.  Sal requested that I post it.  Take three deep, cleansing breaths and continue.

One awful day, The CFO came to me and said, "Let's get chickens." (HA!  You get where this is going, don't you?)  "Please," I said to him, "tell me you're joking."  My Aunt Marie used to have chickens and I knew that this was NOT a good thing.

Alas, nature boy was not joking and shortly thereafter thirteen chickens arrived at their new home, my backyard.  The CFO sectioned off a corner of our acre lot and built a coop of sorts for the little feathered beasts.  (PETA and I are not one on the chicken issue.)  "See," he tells me,"they'll stay in here.  The kids can feed them and gather the eggs.  It will be like a science experiment.  YOU WON'T HAVE TO DO A THING."

Right.

It took the chickens approximately ten minutes to escape the pen and run amuck in my backyard.  They were impossible to keep fenced in.  Houdini had nothing on these guys.  They ran around the house.  They ran under the house. The chickens even (ahem) crossed the road to visit the neighbors.

Did you know that chickens poop?  The poopage was truly impressive. It was on the back porch, the front porch, the driveway, the shed, the front walk and even on my car.  It was the most extensive collection of poop to be found outside of a petting zoo.  The A.C. (moi) was not happy.

And then there was the Big Black Rooster.  He was evil, that bird.  The Big Black Rooster thought he owned the front walk and would attack anyone who questioned his ownership.  That would have been me.  We had a series of battles ending in one scratched arm, three pecked toes and a bird with a bat sized impression on the side of his head.

Louisville Slugger   1

Big Black Devil       0

And yet he lived.

I will admit to enjoying fresh eggs on occasion.  Note to self: If you feed your chickens boiled crawfish heads, your omlettes will be orange.  In the beginning, we didn't find that many eggs.  Coincidentally, behind the coop there was a pile of wood left over from a remodeling job.  (There is a connection.  Wait for it.)  Some of you may have a similar pile in your yards.  It sits there for months, unmoved by nagging, bribery or tears.  When the CFO finally decided to remove that cultural landmark he found a surprise waiting underneath.  The Tiger, who was then five, wanted baby chicks and had been hiding the eggs underneath one of the boards, waiting for them to hatch.  Twenty-four eggs.  International treaties should ban the smell that hatched from those eggs.

I had thirteen chickens.  No, wait.  Now there were sixteen chickens!  I bellowed at the CFO.  "When did we acquire three more stinking, pooping chickens?"   Pause.  "We have sixteen chickens?"  To this day I'm not sure where those birds came from and no one's talking.

By this time, they were pets, of course. They had names.  Cutie, Gumbo, Sauce Picante.  The children would have been devastated if anything were to happen to the little darlings.  During this time, the CFO took a job in TENNESSEE leaving me alone with THOSE BIRDS.  About the same time our neighbors from down the road moved LEAVING THEIR DOGS BEHIND.  Funny thing about dogs.  If you don't feed them, they get hungry.  Hungry enough to, say, ATTACK CHICKENS. 

So it was, on the morning of my birthday, I awoke to the GREAT CHICKEN MASSACRE.  As I was the only adult in residence, I spent the morning of my birthday disposing of the remains.  And that, my friends, is the reason I DON'T LIKE CHICKENS.

So, enjoy your Patriot Day and (Teddy Roosevelt's warnings aside) be grateful for our life of soft-living. 

Scrambled eggs for breakfast, kids?

First the Washer, Then the Car, and NOW

The wireless router is out. Posting will be spotty until we get a new one. I took advantage of my forced absence from the 'net and cleaned out that nasty looking closet. You know the one. It had taken up heckling me when I walked by. It had to be silenced. If this internet vacation keeps up, who knows, I may get the kids' rooms done, too!

Or not.

Happy Fourth, everybody! 

Queen for the Day

I was Queen for the Day. I had a crown and everything. On my special day, everything was supposed to go my way. Of course, it did.

Well, The C.F.O. had to work, but that was completely not his fault. Unfortunately though, that meant that I had to take the kids to church on my own. We had to get there early for a special event. I was in charge of blowing up the helium balloons, and on my special day, when I get to do what I want, I really wanted to suck down a little helium and do my Minnie Mouse impersonation. However, that would not have been a good example for my children, so I didn't. (It's a sad state of affairs when you have to act like a mother on Mother's Day.)

After we got home from church, I took a nap. Someone woke me up to ask if he could ride his bike, but I am sure he just forgot it was my special day. That same someone drank the carbonated, caffeinated beverage that I got for myself as a special treat on my special day. In all fairness, he did offer it to me after he took a swig (UCK!), but considering good health practices, I opted not to drink after someone who has a putrid, festering cold.

The storm last night left us without power for a few hours. Needless to say, the UNO game, the tennis shoes, the door hanger, the bowling ball and the flashlight (a preteen tornado survival kit) did not get picked up last night. Since we were in a hurry this morning, they didn't get picked up then, either. Evidently we are still hurrying, because all of that stuff still hasn't been picked up. It will be picked up shortly, I am sure, as today is my special day and no one would expect me to pick it up. I do have a crown, you know.

The crown is part of the theme for the day...Flowers. I am the "Queen of Flowers." Everything has been very flowery today. My children enjoy picking a theme for my special day each year. The year before last, the theme was slugs. There were slug posters, slug cards, slugs on the floor, slugs on the walls and (naturally enough) a Pin-the-Tail-On-the-Slug game. The theme arose from an unfortunate incident which occurred during a slug infestation that happened shortly before my special day that year. I stepped on a slug (in my own kitchen, thank you very much) and slid for a mile. The children were highly amused.

I think you will understand when I say I preferred this year's theme.

Yes, it has been a special day. A day filled with squabbles and messes and noise and ear aches and hacking coughs. It was my special day....A Mother's Day.

Oddly enough, it didn't seem all that different from any other day.

But I'm keeping the crown.

Happy Mother's Day!